hmmm...I'm hungry and no one is really around...damn!
Do i dare venture out on Bard alone???? Maybe i should...independence never really hurt anyone and I am very hungry.
I think a bowl of something here in this room should suffice...
how pathetic...

So I just watched Star Wars: Episode dos...from the comfort of my dormroom...all warm with slippers on, looking like crap...the joys of bootleg copies! If anyone wants it, just tell me...I have it on my computer.
The reviews have been a little scathing and i do agree on somethings (Hayden Christensen talks in these horrible flowery cliches blah blah I've longed for you in my dreams, blah blah blah...but I dont know anyone in real life who actually talks that way)
Okay, I'll admit it...I really liked it. I was picking up all these references to the other Star Wars...making fun of Jar Jar (he's not in it as much, YAY) and yes, I did watch it by myself but I wanted to see it so badly, I degraded myself to watching it alone. Oh well...I have seen it, so there!
Now I have what I call as Star Wars Lust! I downloaded the John Williams Main Theme, humming along...acting like a complete loser...but it's what i do best, right?
I should be a Jedi.
Think about it...no, seriously...think about it.
"A long time ago...in a galaxy far, far away..."
Emily Wars! Episode 1: Attack of the West Point Cadets!

Done with registration...now all i need to figure out is if i can survive all those political culture classes!
I just have a small thought...it's kind of a sad the way you make a relationship with a person and then, in an instant, after everything seemed to good...they're gone from your life and you just sit in your room and wonder, "I wonder what happened..."

Ho Hum...

Sometimes I think it would be nice to get a "Beer Pong" education...you know, with the large classes, frat houses, and all that's on my mind is "I can't lose at Beer Pong."
Today Finkel told me that my writing was excellent...and that was after the class destroyed my "Vignette from Muncie, Indiana" story. It hurt yes, because the story was painful, but too soon...wait five years until you've got it from an objective angle. Who knows, maybe one day my novel Irrational Hypothesis, will be winning me a Pulitzer. Wouldn't that be silly, me with a Pulitzer!
I just cleaned my room...My side and Nath's side are like day and night...My side looks almost clean and her side looks like a toxic waste site. It probably is.
I'll be home in nine days and Mom's takin me to the Olive Garden. Thank the Lord I'm goin home! I love Bard but it'll be so nice to get out of here and live in the homelife for three weeks and then, OFF TO NEMC! HOORAH!
Well, I don't really have much to say except my first year seminar paper is done, almost...just have to tweek...all that's left is the 5-7 page Philosophy paper and two 3-4 page papers due thrusday...or wednesday, I don't really remember. =)
My orchestra concert is tonight...blah...oh well...My mom is going to be here in an hour!
All right..time to practice my cello...farewell fools!

I never realized how awfully difficult the real world is until i came to college. Bard is not the real world I know, but we've got the aspects of work here.
Damn fucking work...and I get paranoid easier now, looking behind my shoulders and what not...
While eating in Schade's, the most beautiful restaurant in Highland Falls, whose line is, "Serving the long grey line for over forty years..." while Jason and I talked about Alex and Indiana, it occured to me that there's a lot i forgot to talk about...like Arby's "five for five..."
I'd explain it, but the story is just not that tasteful.
The real world is unpleasant...but I have to go, my microwavable feast is beeping for my attention.
Remember this tidbit for life, "Never eat the Arby's "Five for five" in front of your girlfriend unless you want to make her gag"
...That is all

So i'm talking about the year with Sean and we have realized that this year could not exist. Look at all the weird shit that has gone on!
September 11th
West Point? -I still dont think that place exists (even though im leaving to go there in 20 minutes)
Muncie, Indiana
Johnny Garrison
Bard College (my college is defiantly strange)
the news about my best friend
- These cannot exist...I am going wake up and everything is going to be back to normal...
Thank the Lord I'll be at camp and fenced away from the outside world where nothing can possibly hurt me....hooray for living in dream worlds!

It seems that I really cant write in this anymore...thanks to someone calling me pathetic...
So I'm now frozen with any notion that what I'm saying is pathetic. What kind of depresses me, but then again, when am i not depressed?
Next semester I'm taking three government classes. hooray.
I feel like eating debbie snack cakes and milk and watching a movie alone.
Everyone in Darien is home from college now and they're all done and happy...well not me, I'm still here in the woods, with papers stacking up and me, with no intention of actually wanting to do them.
Maybe i'll paint a copy of my military watercolor for Jason as a present...he can hang it in his barracks and then get walking hours. Kind of shameful art can get the shit kicked out of you at West Point.
I saw Hollywood Ending, the new Woody Allen thing..it was good, just what I needed. I needed to get out of this box of a dorm...I needed to see something from the real world (though woody allen going out with Debra Messing is highly unlikely) but still...it was still something feasible...everything at Bard is like some sort of sick fantasy land. I'm expecting a ferris wheel outside of the campus center anyday...right next to our swing set (we actually have a swing set)
I'm going to take my pills and dream of subletting my apartment to supermodels, their fathers, my neighbor, and the unknown man in the ascot who talked about trains and driving through the unknown, though the unknown to me seemed known.